Kids have it nailed. They really do. We could do a helluva lot worse than choosing not to listen to them.
Shy Boy had a friend over on a play date recently. I knew how it was going to pan out before we even got back to the house.
And I let it.
These two little guys “get” each other. They just do.
There is no agenda. No competition. No one following the other. They do their own thing; at times side by side and at other times, alone.
Both choices are ok and both boys are fine with this too. Comfortable and at ease with it.
This is how the play date started and how it continued as the afternoon grew into evening.
When Shy Boy comes home from school he likes to chill. He will sit in front of a cartoon for maybe ten minutes and after that he visits the bathroom. Sometimes he takes his DS with him.
Then he is ready to do other things.
So whilst he was tending to his own needs, there was lots of exploring and walking around being done by our guest.
With his fan club in tow. Smallest Boy was thrilled with this new face even though he knows it well. Lovely Liam was in Holiday Tour Guide mode, making sure his older brother’s friend didn’t miss anything.
Snacks and obair bhaile (homework) out of the way in record time and then I discovered what all the walking around was about.
Lego! (Lego rocks! Get some!)
Off they all trooped upstairs to get stuck into Lego City.
And this is what I observed with interest even though I knew it would unfold.
Sometimes Shy Boy moved away from his friend to sit on the stairs and play his DS while his friend stayed in the bedroom building Lego cities.
On other occasions our friend went into the playroom to draw on the chalk boards and come to the kitchen ask for something to eat.
There was a perfect symmetry there. Both were content in each other’s company and equally, if one of them needed to move away for some head and body space, that was cool too.
I didn’t ask that Shy Boy stay with his friend at all times and make sure he was ok, that he wasn’t bored, and in need of something.
Never once was there a cross word spoken or a voice raised or an argument over a toy. (Lovely Liam and Smallest Boy don’t count here.)
They just got on with the play date.
It was lovely. It was great.
And then the time came for the play date to be over and again there was no fuss from either party.
I was surprised that Shy Boy opted out of the drive but he also likes to finish his evening the same way he starts; with a little bit of TV and quiet time.
This was ok too.
Kids are relaxed little people. They just go with the flow.
We should observe and take a leaf out of their book. Less stress. More fun.